We’ve been trained to soothe and celebrate with food, but that’s not real progress or true well-being.
We’re sad… cookies. It’s hot… ice cream. Work is stressful… hello, bag of chips. Your kid goes potty in the toilet… M&Ms! Even at a kids’ baseball practice, what’s handed out? Juice boxes and pretzels.
We’re human. We use food to celebrate, to soothe, and sometimes just to survive the day. Whether it’s the big feelings or the little moments, we’ve been trained to pair them with food. Maybe you’ve said, “Today was brutal, I’m having a giant bowl of ice cream to relax.” But then yesterday, you had two cocktails to celebrate crushing it at work. It’s a pattern — and you’re not alone in it.
There’s one place food-as-reward shows up a lot right now: after a workout. Think about it. Your friend crushes her morning bootcamp and then justifies a burger and fries at lunch because she “earned it.” Another friend eats most of the chips and guac at dinner, then promises to work out extra hard the next day. That’s not balanced. That’s a rollercoaster. And while I’m all for living life, I’m also the first to say, “You can’t outrun your fork.” That workout doesn’t cancel out the food choices — it’s not a math equation.
Let’s be honest. A lot of the food rewards we use don’t actually make us feel better. Sometimes they make us feel worse. That ice cream? It doesn’t fix the stress from work. In fact, once the sugar rush fades, you might feel worse than when you started. That man who stress-ate a whole pint of ice cream? Still stressed about his boss — and now about the sugar crash and guilt that followed. The “reward” just added another problem.
But here’s the good news. The problem isn’t rewards in general. It’s what we’ve been taught to use as rewards. It’s time to rethink what qualifies as a reward. Instead of leaning on food, we can turn to what I call NFRR — non-food-related rewards. These are the things that light us up and feel indulgent but actually support our goals instead of sabotaging them.
NFRR are personal. They might look like shopping and getting yourself a small gift, just because you stuck to your healthy habits for the week. Maybe it’s a massage, a mani-pedi, or an hour to yourself without anyone needing anything from you. Maybe it’s time with someone who makes you laugh, or that podcast you’ve been dying to catch up on while taking a walk.
And here’s your reminder: small wins are still wins. You don’t have to wait until the end of your weight loss journey or until you’ve nailed every habit perfectly to celebrate. That kind of thinking delays joy and makes it way too easy to give up. Instead, build in mini-moments that keep you motivated and moving forward. Progress matters.
One easy way to get started is to write a list of what actually feels like a reward to you. What do you love but rarely give yourself permission to enjoy? What makes you feel proud, relaxed, or joyful? Put that list somewhere easy to access — maybe on your phone or taped to your laptop. Heck, maybe even slap it on that pint of ice cream in the freezer. That way, when you’re tempted to turn to food, you have another option that actually supports your success.
Healthy habits go way beyond what you eat. They start in your brain. Rewarding yourself with things that bring joy — not just sugar — changes your whole relationship with food. It helps you see that the chocolate or chips might feel good for five minutes but leave you feeling worse in the long run. Choosing a non-food reward is about feeling good now and later.
And hey, just by reading this? You’re already building awareness. You’re already one step closer to real, sustainable change. That, my friend, is worth celebrating.